pretty girls
a terrible roleplaying game by William Burke
Character Creation
Characters have four stats, and a name.
Charm -- your ability to convince other people that your shit is dealt with.
Denial -- your ability to ignore your shit rather than dealing with it.
Sleaze -- your ability to take advantage of systems you're not part of and make them deal with your shit for you.
Violence -- your ability to make other people deal with your shit by threatening something they care about.
Divide fifteen points among these stats. No stat can be higher than 6.
The Challenge Rating of the game starts at 0.
The Game
The game is made up of rounds, which are divided into turns -- one for each player. At the beginning of each round, roll a d3 and add the result to the Challenge Rating.
Turns
Each player in turn comes up with a goal he wishes to accomplish and explains how he will use two of his stats to accomplish said goal. He then adds his two stats together and rolls that many six-sided dice. Fours or higher are successes.
You must roll at least as many successes as the Challenge Rating to avoid Bad Shit. If you do so, narrate accomplishing your goal. Any additional successes are spent on having sex with girls.
Girls
You may divide up your additional successes between Girls as you see fit. Write each Girl down on your sheet along with the number of successes spent on her. If you spent at least two successes, give her a name (otherwise, she can never have a name). For each Girl, narrate how you meet and have sex with her.
Example:
Miguel has just started playing a game of Pretty Girls and the Challenge Rating is at 3. He describes how his goal is to get to the Post Office, and how he will hitch a ride with a friend of his, using his Charm and Sleaze. He has a 5 Charm and a 3 Sleaze, giving him 8 dice to roll -- he gets 5 successes, so he has two to spend on having sex with girls. He could spend them on two Girls with one success each, but he chooses to put them both into one Girl. He names her Deirdre, marks down Deirdre: 2, and narrates how he meets a girl in the line at the Post Office, talks about mail, and ends up fucking her in the back of her car.
Bad Shit
If you fail to get enough successes to equal the Challenge Rating, Bad Shit happens. Narrate how you totally fuck up your life by not getting stuff done. For each success you lacked, subtract one point from one of the stats you were using, until they reach 0. If your stats both reach 0 and you still have lacking successes, you have two options. First, subtract one point from each of your other stats for each lacking success. Second, gain one Shit Point for each lacking success. (You can mix and match.)
Fortunately, you can use Girls to prevent Bad Shit from happening....
Using Girls
At any time, you can use a Girl on your sheet to help accomplish your current goal. Immediately narrate how you call her up and convince her to help you out with whatever you're doing. Roll a number of dice equal to her rating, then reduce it by one. You may use multiple Girls on the same turn. You may, if you wish, spend additional successes on having sex with a Girl you've used this turn -- add them to her rating. A Girl whose rating is reduced to 0 can no longer be used (but don't take her off your sheet.)
Abusing Girls
If using them is not sufficient, you can always abuse them. You may abuse a Girl you've already used this turn -- narrate how you do something obviously hurtful and fuck up her life for your own benefit. Roll a number of dice equal to her rating, plus one, then cross her off your sheet forever. You may abuse a Girl whose rating has been reduced to 0 without using her first.
Whenever you abuse a Girl, you get a Shit Point.
Example:
Later in the game, Miguel is trying to avoid being arrested, with a Challenge Rating of 14. He calls up Deirdre and asks her to hide him in her apartment for a while, which gets him two dice, and reduces her rating to 1. Against a 14, though, this isn't going to be enough -- so he steals her savings and books it while she's out getting them takeout food. This is worth two more dice (her new rating of 1, plus one die), and he crosses her off his sheet. Miguel gets a Shit Point.
Ending the Game
If your stats all drop to zero, you decide to get a real job and a real life. You're out of the game.
If your Shit Points are ever higher than your total stats, your life is fucked up beyond your ability to hold it together -- you end up in prison, in the morgue, or in Mexico. You're out of the game.
(If both conditions obtain, both consequences occur.)
Otherwise, the game ends when nobody can stand to play it any more.
Playing As Girls
Replace every occurrence of the word girl in the text, except the the one in the title and every occurrence in this section, with boy. Fix the pronouns.
(influences: MLwM, Bacchanal, Nicotine Girls, this guy I know)
Character Creation
Characters have four stats, and a name.
Charm -- your ability to convince other people that your shit is dealt with.
Denial -- your ability to ignore your shit rather than dealing with it.
Sleaze -- your ability to take advantage of systems you're not part of and make them deal with your shit for you.
Violence -- your ability to make other people deal with your shit by threatening something they care about.
Divide fifteen points among these stats. No stat can be higher than 6.
The Challenge Rating of the game starts at 0.
The Game
The game is made up of rounds, which are divided into turns -- one for each player. At the beginning of each round, roll a d3 and add the result to the Challenge Rating.
Turns
Each player in turn comes up with a goal he wishes to accomplish and explains how he will use two of his stats to accomplish said goal. He then adds his two stats together and rolls that many six-sided dice. Fours or higher are successes.
You must roll at least as many successes as the Challenge Rating to avoid Bad Shit. If you do so, narrate accomplishing your goal. Any additional successes are spent on having sex with girls.
Girls
You may divide up your additional successes between Girls as you see fit. Write each Girl down on your sheet along with the number of successes spent on her. If you spent at least two successes, give her a name (otherwise, she can never have a name). For each Girl, narrate how you meet and have sex with her.
Example:
Miguel has just started playing a game of Pretty Girls and the Challenge Rating is at 3. He describes how his goal is to get to the Post Office, and how he will hitch a ride with a friend of his, using his Charm and Sleaze. He has a 5 Charm and a 3 Sleaze, giving him 8 dice to roll -- he gets 5 successes, so he has two to spend on having sex with girls. He could spend them on two Girls with one success each, but he chooses to put them both into one Girl. He names her Deirdre, marks down Deirdre: 2, and narrates how he meets a girl in the line at the Post Office, talks about mail, and ends up fucking her in the back of her car.
Bad Shit
If you fail to get enough successes to equal the Challenge Rating, Bad Shit happens. Narrate how you totally fuck up your life by not getting stuff done. For each success you lacked, subtract one point from one of the stats you were using, until they reach 0. If your stats both reach 0 and you still have lacking successes, you have two options. First, subtract one point from each of your other stats for each lacking success. Second, gain one Shit Point for each lacking success. (You can mix and match.)
Fortunately, you can use Girls to prevent Bad Shit from happening....
Using Girls
At any time, you can use a Girl on your sheet to help accomplish your current goal. Immediately narrate how you call her up and convince her to help you out with whatever you're doing. Roll a number of dice equal to her rating, then reduce it by one. You may use multiple Girls on the same turn. You may, if you wish, spend additional successes on having sex with a Girl you've used this turn -- add them to her rating. A Girl whose rating is reduced to 0 can no longer be used (but don't take her off your sheet.)
Abusing Girls
If using them is not sufficient, you can always abuse them. You may abuse a Girl you've already used this turn -- narrate how you do something obviously hurtful and fuck up her life for your own benefit. Roll a number of dice equal to her rating, plus one, then cross her off your sheet forever. You may abuse a Girl whose rating has been reduced to 0 without using her first.
Whenever you abuse a Girl, you get a Shit Point.
Example:
Later in the game, Miguel is trying to avoid being arrested, with a Challenge Rating of 14. He calls up Deirdre and asks her to hide him in her apartment for a while, which gets him two dice, and reduces her rating to 1. Against a 14, though, this isn't going to be enough -- so he steals her savings and books it while she's out getting them takeout food. This is worth two more dice (her new rating of 1, plus one die), and he crosses her off his sheet. Miguel gets a Shit Point.
Ending the Game
If your stats all drop to zero, you decide to get a real job and a real life. You're out of the game.
If your Shit Points are ever higher than your total stats, your life is fucked up beyond your ability to hold it together -- you end up in prison, in the morgue, or in Mexico. You're out of the game.
(If both conditions obtain, both consequences occur.)
Otherwise, the game ends when nobody can stand to play it any more.
Playing As Girls
Replace every occurrence of the word girl in the text, except the the one in the title and every occurrence in this section, with boy. Fix the pronouns.
(influences: MLwM, Bacchanal, Nicotine Girls, this guy I know)
posted by pigeon at 12:39 PM
